Take a Break for Once
Alexander was in his office, highlighter in hand. He read through the law textbook, highlighting things he deemed important and occasionally jotting down notes in his notebook on the side. Suddenly, he was startled by a sudden knock on the door. He looked up to see John peeking in through the now half-open door. He sighed and set his highlighter down. John walked over to Alexander, standing beside him at his desk. “Are you gonna come to bed soon? It’s past midnight,” John asked him, the concern very evident in his voice. “I can’t right now, I have an exam tomorrow morning,” Alexander responded, “You should go to sleep though, you need it,” John shook his head, he had been watching the man he loved drifting away from him for the past few months. John only became more and more worried with each night that Alex pushed off taking care of himself with something as simple as resting. “Just come to bed! I haven’t seen you out of your office in almost a week!” John argued with the exhausted man. Alex ignored him and went back to reading the textbook, acting as if he didn’t feel bad for troubling his lover so much, but he did. The guilt was eating him inside, yet not as much as the fear of failing was. “Well I’m going to sleep,” John said defeatedly before storming out. Alexander glanced up, watching the other leave. He opened his mouth to say something, but John slammed the office door behind him before Alex could get any words out.
Alexander continued studying until unkowingly passing out being woken up by the sound of the morning birds singing outside his window. He lifted his head & realized he had fallen asleep on the open textbook, damn he needed to sleep. He went to take a sip of his coffee before noticing it was empty. The man stood up, groaning at how stiff his joints had become, he pushed through it and walked to the kitchen to refill his coffee. He heard John in the living room, watching a show he had been binge watching for the past week. “Why was John up this early?” Alexander thought to himself as he poured in the coffee. Out of the corner of his eye, he caught a glimpse of the clock on the microwave. It was 8…:40 AM! His exam was in 15 minutes! He cursed himself out under his breath as he ran to grab his bag from his office and sprinted out of the home he shared with John who he forgot to say goodbye or even good morning to.
John had woken up an hour and a half ago, he got ready for the day and he chose to poke his head into Alexander’s office as he walked downstairs to make himself some breakfast. He saw the brunette with his head down on the textbook as if it was a pillow. He just huffed in annoyance how stubborn Alex was, almost always overworking himself until he dropped. He quietly closed the door and went about his morning. Just as he was working on a small sketch while watching House M.D. on the television, he noticed Alexander walk down the stairs to the kitchen. Before he could get up to greet Alex, he watched him dash up back the stairs then out the door. John shook his head before going back to drawing, this wasn’t the first time Alex pushed himself too far and his plan went sideways. It wasn’t the first time he accidentally ignored John either, but John’s grown used to it.
Hours passed by, the two went about their days, going from class to class with small breaks to study & catch up on assignments in between. At 1:20 PM, both finally had a break to eat lunch. John saw Alexander walking to a nearby cafe, he jogged toward the half-awake man. “Alex!” He called out, slowing down once he caught up to the other, “Hey, how did it go?” He questioned. “It was… horrible,” Alexander responded, “I barely got there on time and I kept accidentally drifting off as well as zoning out,” he further explained. “At least you’re done now,” John said with a smile, draping his arm over Alexander's shoulders. “Well, I’m starving, wanna come eat with me?” John asked the other, he wasn't really hungry, but he liked being melodramatic. “I’m not hungry. I think I’ll just read in the library today,” he responded. “Again?” John said, furrowing his eyebrows. Alexander just ignored him, “I’ll see you later, love you,” He gave John a warm smile that was a little forced before walking off. “Love you too…” John murmured before walking into the cafe alone. He couldn’t stop thinking about Alex throughout the rest of the day, but not in the usual romantic way, it was purely out of concern.
He sat down, coffee in one hand, phone in the other. He only ate an apple, he was too worried to be that hungry. He glanced through his contacts, he needed someone's help, some advice. But, everyone he knew was busy. He scrolled through the names until finding someone who he knew wasn’t currently in the middle of something. Aaron. Not the best choice, he knew Aaron didn’t like Alexander much, but he needed someone to talk to. “John? What do you need?” Aaron answered the phone. “I need some help… It's about Alexander,” John replied. “What’s wrong with him?” Aaron sounded bored, yet a little interested in what was happening to Alex. “He’s been stressing himself out so much, I don’t know what to do. He’s not only neglecting his own needs, but he’s started to neglect me too,” John explained, sounding more upset than he meant to, but he couldn’t help it. He hated how overly obsessed Alex was with his studies, he hated being ignored because of it. “Then return the favor,” John paused at Aaron’s response. What? Ignore Alexander when he clearly needed help? It didn’t make sense. Aaron must’ve picked up on John's confused silence, he further clarified what he meant. “Ignore him like he ignores you, stop worrying so much about him. If you let him fall on his own, he’ll learn to get up by himself. But, if you keep stressing yourself out about him, he’ll drag you down with him,” John didn’t know how to respond, this only made his anxiety worse. He was even more conflicted about how to go about the whole situation. “I’ll… think about it. Thanks, Aaron,” John answered before hanging up and slouching in his seat, looking up as if the plain white tiles covering the ceiling would give him the answer of what to do.
Following his final classes for the day, the sun had started to set, and John had come back home. It was oddly silent. He took his shoes off at the door before walking up to his bedroom. He paused at Alexander’s office, the door was cracked open just a little. He couldn’t help but glance into the room. He saw Alex at his desk with his outdated laptop open on his desk. He decided it was probably nothing and continued to go get ready to unwind. As he was in the middle of taking a shower, he heard a loud yell from Alexander's office. He shut off the water and stepped out, wrapping a towel around his waist before running into Alexander’s office. He saw the other on the verge of a breakdown, slamming his laptop shut then looking down at the floor. “No, no, no, no!” Alex yelled angrily. “What’s wrong?” John asked, stepping closer. “I got a damn C- after all of that work! No!” He responded, covering his face in his hands. John was a little confused on why this grade made Alexander so emotional, he knew about how scared Alex was when it came to academic failure, but he still couldn’t fully understand why his lover was like this.
He thought back to what Aaron told him, maybe he should just leave now and let Alexander fall on his own. But when Alex looked back up at the laptop with those teary, bloodshot eyes that were filled with self-hatred, John forgot all about what Aaron told him. Alex had already been left to fall on his own so many times in the past, he couldn’t let it happen again. He wouldn’t hurt his lover like that, it’s just not who he is. He walked to Alexander and bent down to be at eye-level with him before wrapping his arms around the distraught man, pulling him close to his chest. “It’s alright, you didn’t fail and you probably did better than some of your peers. It’s not the end of the world. It’s alright, Alexander,” John comforted him in a soft, gentle tone. Alex breathed heavily as he tried to stop the tears pouring from his eyes. He leaned into the others arms, feeling grounded as the warmth from the other spread to him.
A moment passed, John checked the small clock on Alexander's laptop screen, 8:12 PM, not super late, but it had been a rough day and both men were very tired. John slowly pulled away from Alexander, despite Alex clinging onto him. "C'mon, I'll help you to bed," He said as he held Alexander's hand and walked him out of the office where Alex had been basically living since the semester started. Alex whined stubbornly, but John just ignored him. He let Alex flop onto the bed as he grabbed both him & the other some comfortable pajamas. By the time Alex was done simply changing his clothes, John had already fully completed his nighttime routine. "You're not even going to brush your teeth?" John questioned, "Tomorrow..." Alexander muttered. John chuckled and gently removed Alexander's glasses for him then laid down beside him. Alex passed out in a matter of seconds, John stayed awake for a few minutes, admiring how the other seemed so peaceful and content in his sleep. It was rare, especially during semesters, that he didn't look like he was constantly on the verge of a breakdown. It put John's anxious mind to ease before he fell asleep as well, holding the man he loved closely in his arms. All is finally well, until another exam would arise, but the two shall enjoy the momentary peace for now.